Hello Diary, I am back.......
. I just had to wash my face and come back. I became emotional when I started to write about Suja. She is my X wife.
As everyone or as every human I too expected the same. All I wanted was a peaceful life. I have everything in my life. I have my beautiful family who are more than anything in my life. I was sure that Dad and Mom will never go wrong when it comes to getting a bride for me. But there is something called destiny and that never spares any one. I was never in the hands of fate and destiny in my life. I saw how it took different twists and turns and gave a shock of my life that my eyes failed to believe, yet the truth which was bitter.
More over Mom was always proud about my two sisters in laws who she had searched for my brothers. They are not only equivalent in money, family status, studies but also in understanding the family very well. They knew about family cultures, our habits and as a whole they are perfect wives. My brothers nor had ever about them. They knew how the working men are and they adjusted their life and tastes accordingly to the family. And because of this wonderful attitude the family was hassle free and peace prevailed. I saw them as my mother’s as they really behaved with me the same way.
Soon the whole family sat in front of the broker and started laying down their expectations. Dad started with same family status, educated girl. Most of all her parents should be from the same caste and religion. I was never sure why Dad was always behind family from same caste and creed. That’s the same way how abroad is. They don’t even know if life needs all these. But here, our culture respects and expects these values and I was no where an exceptional.
Mom was keen on looking for a girl from a joint family only. Both my brother’s wives are from a joint family. They both are cousins and both my brothers got married the same day. And that kind of unity is such an admirable thing to see. I was asking my sister in laws if they had another sister or a cousin whom I can marry so that the entire family will be bonded. But they nodded their head saying they were the last ladies to get married. O, still I was sure that my home ladies can never go wrong in their selection. I told them that I don’t need a girl to give me happiness, get me a gives me peace and most of all the family is more important to me. Arun anna was worried if I any other commitments or any kind of expectations. I just nodded a big NO. Why should I take the pain when my parents and brothers n their wives can do that.
I did have some expectations. I wanted a joint family. End of the day all should assemble to eat together. Weekends at our home and that’s together. A girl who doesn’t need to go to work. I don’t mind even she would work, but before I drop in home I expect her to be at home. I don’t want my other home ladies doing anything for me. I am sure Mom needs some rest.
The search began and that went ahead for 6 months. My abroad trips continued. I was travelling between Bangalore and Chennai in different intervals. I had travelled almost to all the countries in Asia asking for projects and meetings. All was successful. I had a small plan. Just before getting married I wanted to build my own house and complete all my credits.
My parents started to bug the broker so much that he became a frequent visitor. The broker didn’t stop his response. The first thing in the morning every other day he visited our home and gave a list of girls photos and profiles and Dad saw them before he left to office and by end of the day called the broker and gave his denial.
Slowly the search started to give them the disbelief. That was when my Dad’s friend Dhanashekar came up with a proposal for his daughter Suja. She is one and only daughter to her parents. She is well educated and she was double graduate. There was no necessity for her to work and her family status was too good that she was never allowed to step for any interviews as well. Her Dad was strict about this particular thing and told her that she can persue to work incase her future husband and his family says so. He told that there were none of the ladies in his family who worked. He strongly believed in that. So Suja was brought up with luxary and money. She was over pampered and never had been in a joint family. MY Dad hesitated about this proposal as she is the only daughter. They were worried if she would adjust in a joint family. Both her Dad and Mom assured on behalf of their daughter.
Slowly Dad and Mom falling into that trap and now to get both Suja and Me. We did meet up in a temple on one fine Saturday morning. I liked her in the first instint. She was so beautiful. She was wearing a saree and her long hair was covered with flowers. She looked so beautiful. Her face lit like the moon. She two eyes were brown in colour and that resembled Actress Aishwariya’s eyes. Yeah, everyones wife / lover is most precious to them. But she was so gorgeous that I was just awe struck and speechless. She was 5.7” feet tall. She look slim and beautiful. Her eyes did shine like stars. She not only looked fair, but was healthy and bubbly.
I hardly spoke for 2 mins with her. Rather should say nothing other than,”HI, Iam Tarun”, and she replied,”O nice to meet you.” I knew from that very look of her, she was feeling shy. She didn’t even lift her head to look into my face. Mom came back. She told us .. that everything has been decided. And also gave a strict warning that we shouldn’t meet nor talk to each other until the wedding is over.
I was wondering what was all that.. infact in this 21st century who believes these cultures. Its most of the time live in relationships or love marriages and whats there if we speak or meet each other? Are these family rules important? Neeraj anna told me this.. that its better that you guys don’t meet as after marriage there will be an urge and liking to know about each other.. why break that suspense.
Arjun’s older brother Neeraj had been married for 3 years and was not blessed with any kid. Though the family pesters them so much for a heir, the happy couple just behave and enjoy life as new weds. His wife Reena was well educated and that’s when during my marriage proposal time she got an offer to work in UK. She moved to Manchester. And she had been there for a period of 6 months and in another 2 -3 months Neeraj anna would also leave. She had searched for a job for him. And they are going to be there together. His marriage was a love marriage. So from his experience from his wedding there was nothing that his wife didn’t know before they got married. So there was nothing to tell her or show each other something new.. so his experience gave me an idea to wait to be with my Angel Suja till my wedding.
The engagement dates were fixed and I was posted permanently in Bangalore. There was none at Arjuns home to take care of his parents so he chose to be in Chennai branch. During my engagement all that I opened my mouth and ask was to push the wedding date like away for 1 year. As planned I wanted a new house to be built and I wanted to take my wife to a new house. I had purchased a new land in Kalyan Nagar, Bangalore. But, Suja’s parents were adamant that they wanted to present me a new car, bike, a house and what not during my marriage.
The dead line was just two months …… and Suja and her mom came over to Bangalore. They wanted to stay with me and furnish the house. They did have a villa in White field. And that was pretty close to my office. They took me to the car showroom and gifted me a Lancer car. The best car ever. Later we both did the shopping to buy each and everything for our new home. That time it was a nice experience to talk to each other and waited to be together alone when her mom was not around to exchange glances. She did enjoy everything. So did I. the wedding purchase was all over. We had been to Shakthi silks in Bangalore to purchase our wedding collections and that cost us the time ….. you pretty know how ladies shopping would be. Pooh!!!!!! All was done. I felt sad that two weeks got over in a jiffy. The time was not enough and she left with her mom. I enjoyed each and everyday with her. I couldn’t wait for the day when I can hold and feel her hands.
Another 45 days more for my wedding and that’s when she called me. Suja called me on my office land line. She asked for me and I was in a meeting. It was already 4pm when I came out of the meeting room and was running around with hunger. I wanted to eat something very badly. There was short note on my desk. It was signed as Suja “I am waiting to have lunch with you.. call me when you are done with your meeting,”.…… Suja??? What is she doing here? Did she come to my office? O my god. Bless me god .. I didn’t even feel the urge for food now but the urge was see her and beautiful face. I just rang to my PA and that’s when there was a knock on the door.. It was Suja.. I was surprised. I fell again for her smile. Her beauty was killing me. I could feel the burning urge to hold her hands.. but stood there in my seat and she came in with some parcel in her hand. She told me that she came here to invite her friends and she will here for 4 days. She came today afternoon and waited for me to come over to have lunch together. And my office people knew that what so ever be the situation they never dared to disturb me when I am in the meeting room. So she was informed the same and she was asked to wait. She waited for so long.. my god, the stupid rules of mine made my doll wait with hunger. That moment the anger filled me. I immediately apologized to her but in return she told that she had ordered some KFC meals for us together and she wanted to have food badly as she couldn’t bear her hunger.
We did eat and I asked her where she was planning to stay. She said that doesn’t have any ideas but she wanted to look for a hotel. I asked her if she doesn’t mind she can come to my house. She hesitated and then agreed. I didn’t want to force her much. Soon it was 6 pm and we left home. I took her to my home and informed my maid not to tell anyone (especially our parents) that Suja is staying with me. She wanted to go for a long drive and we did go to Hebbal – Lumbini Gardens. We spent our time there just gazing at each other. I knew that the waves of urge were running into my body. But I knew that this was not the time. I really had to wait………
The first mistake I ever did was that night………. If at all I hadn’t done that I would have escaped from my marriage……. FATE … DESTINY whatever you call that as has screwed my happiness into bits and pieces…